Tuesday, April 12, 2016

When it Rains it Pours: March 28th 2016

Hello hello This week in Illinois has been very rainy. Both literally and emotionally. Something I learned very early on is the highs and lows of being a missionary are very frequent. Often times especially at the MTC I would feel the entire range of emotions in one day. On the plus side this is exhausting and I have no problem falling asleep at night. This week has been a roller coaster full of highs and lows For example One day we are talking with Bunch and he asks us if he can get baptized even sooner and the very next day we get a text from him saying he doesn't know if he can get baptized or be taught anymore. My heart SANK when I read this because we thought maybe he had gotten into some anti-Mormon stuff and hated us. So we called and we're talking to him and he told us that some people at his Mom's work told her that Mormons were evil and going to brain wash her kids and all this stuff and now she has forbidden him from coming to church or being taught by us. I am still devastated to say the least. But this was both a relief and a disappointment. A relief because Bunch still has a testimony of the church and still wants to come and learn. A disappointment because he can't. We were all crying on the phone together and sis smith and I decided to teach him about fasting and asked him to pull out the pamphlet on tithing and fasting and he said he had already read it and I just started crying even harder. HE IS SO GREAT. I am so sad for him and sad there is nothing we can do for him except fast and pray. But I know that Bunch is strong, and so is his testimony, he knows that this Church is true and that it makes him happy. He has the gospel library app and still texts us all the time asking what more he can read and asking us to explain things and he is going to watch conference on his phone. Bunch has a lot of faith and desire, and I take comfort in that and I know that he will be baptized someday. Whether it be when his parents come around or if he has to wait until he is 18 and doesn't need their permission. IT WILL HAPPEN. In other news the very next day after all this happened we got messages from not one, but ALL of our investigators, saying that they were no longer interested in learning more about the gospel and didn't want us to talk to them anymore. It's been great. So we are back to square one Since this week was Easter sister smith and I went to visit some ladies in our ward who are in nursing homes. These were definitely the highs of my week. They are so cute. And almost ALL of them asked us to sing something for them. When you are set apart as a missionary you are blessed with help from Angels as you serve the Lord and I know this is true. Neither sister smith or I enjoy or are good at singing but you can't say no to the elderly!!! And every time we did it we didn't sound nearly as terrible as we usually do and I could feel the spirit so strongly I know that somehow there were angels helping us and carrying our voices in some tune that those Women would enjoy. I hope you all had a great Easter and take time this week to ponder and realize all that Christ has done for you and all that you can do because of him. Whether it's singing for old ladies, or being given the strength to do things that you don't want to, or even something as simple or as important as being able to repent and be forgiven of your sins. That's another thing I've learned more this week. As I have been surrounded by all these amazing missionaries I can't help but feel somewhat inadequate in my knowledge of the gospel among other things. But the gospel, just like life, can and should be simple. The simple things are the most important and most fundamental and if we lose sight of those simple things we can't and won't understand anything else. (Jacob 4:14) that and my Sister Training Leader told me that if I am comparing myself to other missionaries I am spending too much time thinking about myself. Which #1 was a huge call to repentance and #2 IS TRUE. I GOTTA LOSE MYSELF IN THIS WORK. I loved what they said in women's conference, it was all about service and charity. (Especially the little story about the mirror vs the window) and I am SO excited for conference this week and I hope you are all preparing!! I love and pray for all of you Sister Madsen

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